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Rectum removal giggler (gonna tell on myself)

6856 Views 62 Replies 27 Participants Last post by  schott, 
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As a lover of all things that make life easier in the field, I've become a big fan of the Butt Out rectum removal tool. I first thought it was a gimmick, but after seeing a friend get the...butt...out...of a deer in record time, I was sold! It takes the normally annoying and time consuming task of rectum removal down to an extremely fast - literally sub-10 second - exercise in easy field work. It's not much bigger than the average hunting knife, so it's pretty pack-friendly, and I have used it countless times with great results.

Well, something was not going right for me this time. I had a doe down on opening day of muzzleloader season in 2A, and it was time to address the final field dressing task. I pushed the Butt Out into the deer, but was immediately hung up and couldn't insert it any further. Hmmmm...that's strange. I fought and fought with it to no avail. The thing wouldn't go in far enough to grab tissue and get the job done. Then I looked a little more closely and realized what was causing the problem.

Yep.

Wrong hole.


I promptly put the tool in the correct orifice and went on about my business.
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Hey, someone around here needs to share knowledge and save others from near tragedy!


Seriously though, get a Butt Out. It only costs about $10 and I would spend twice that for how fast it works. I take no pride in the effort it takes to get the job done the traditional way. I keep the tool + a few zip-ties in my tag bag: one to attach the tag, and the others to seal the intestine around where I plan to cut. Then Butt Out in, rectum out in seconds. Easy-peasy.
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browninggold said:
You're really into the this...actually pretty "pushy"...you just need to butt out....LOL
I'll wait until the wife and kids are with me at Wal-Mart and will HAVE to find the lady who works in sewing to help me find it.... or maybe the kid who works in electronics.
The wife will just roll her eyes but the kids will probably pee themselves laughing!!!
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That's a moment I'd like to witness first hand!
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tdd said:
I used one. Twice. I felt like I needed to apologize to the deer. Seriously....and it was dead.
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You think you felt guilty?? I thought I was gonna end up on some kinda PA Game Warden registry for what had just transpired!
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WOL said:
I always thought we should use this tool to interogate terrorists. I'm positive that suspect #2 would talk.
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If you want a good laugh, have a look at the customer review titled "Follow instructions carefully" on the Amazon page for it (currently the 3rd one down):

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B002EC...Helpful.Reviews
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GobbleBuck said:
Ya know, sometimes.... sometimes you are having a real bad day. And on that bad day, you decide to check out HPA. And then you read this... and you laugh. Real Hard.

The only problem is less than five minutes ago I went on a tirade about stupid soldiers and the stupid problems they cause. Now I'm sitting here laughing hysterically. So as if everyone in the office wasn't already questioning my sanity.... Thanks Six-gun. Thanks a lot!
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No problem - glad you got a chuckle out of it! I thought this one was too rare of an event not to share it with the masses. When I told my wife this story, she laughed because she thought I was kidding. Then I informed her that, no, this really happened, and she laughed even harder.

browninggold said:
What about the guy who thought up/ invented the contraption...part of me wants to think he's making $ so he genius... butt (see what I did there ?) another part of me wonders how/ why this enters his mind
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Any way you cut it, he's going down in the annals of the outdoor industry (see what I did there? - watch that second "n"...it's a doozy) as one of the greatest hunting contraption inventors of all time.
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Yeah, the one I have is the Butt Out 2 that features the ring. I figured a few guys went to town on a moose or something similar and accidentally went elbow-deep before the manufacturer decided that the design needed a...uh...hard stop.
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LOL - that's serious naming creativity! You should give it serious consideration for your hunting pack. I'm telling you: as long as I have one, I will never go back to the old way.
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Machocheese said:
Six-Gun said:
LOL - that's serious naming creativity! You should give it serious consideration for your hunting pack. I'm telling you: as long as I have one, I will never go back to the old way.
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Yeah, I like the old name myself, lol. I guess it was a little too foreign for the target demographic.

Maybe I'll dig it out for tomorrow... maybe.
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If you use it, just *be sure* to confirm your target!
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WOL said:
I never used it. Is it "righty-tighty, lefty-loosey"? Or is it a reverse thread? Or doesn't matter?
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Universal twist; thread cutting oil is definitely optional.

tdd said:
I'm surprised you all haven't gotten bored by this yet....

Get it? Get it....?

Oh nevermind....
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I'll just say that I assuredly won't be the first volunteer!
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No problem and glad you enjoyed it! Sometimes, ya just gotta be able to laugh at yourself. A good hunting story is becoming a rare commodity and I figure this one is as fair game as any of 'em.

WOL said:
Like a self-tapping screw?
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Yes...wait...

...yes, yes. Well, sort of.

Push, twist, pull, puke.

In that order.
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Yeah, but then you can't come home with stories like this! Gotta have stuff around to ensure an occasional campfire laugh, ya know?
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I've been telling my wife for years: males stop maturing at age 13. A well timed fart will ALWAYS get a giggle.
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Apparently, before the addition of the stop ring, that "foomp" sound you heard was the queue to start retracting...
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Ok, I HATE to bump an old thread, especially one of my own...but I must...because...

...as God is my witness, a buddy of mine managed to defeat the stop ring on a Butt Out field dressing a doe that he shot in Montana this past week. I saw it with my own eyes.

This is not a joke.

This is not a fib.

It seriously happened, and I IMMEDIATELY thought of this thread again. I was crippled with laughter knowing that it would have to be posted.
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