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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
What would you rather hear ? The sound of traffic or a mountain stream running just after it rained ? Blue jays carrying on in the distance or someone complaining about their job ? Squirrels and chipmunks rustling in the leaves or the evening news ? Standing in the checkout line at the grocery store or watching a coyote sneak through the woods by your tree ? Observing a doe with her fawns or listening about politics on the local radio channel ?
Had a bad night tonight . The kids have been misbehaving a little more than normal and I kind of lost it at the dinner table . Having a lot of regret for losing my cool but the wife was understanding and was pretty much on my side . ( She would of made it clear if I was being irrational) With that being said I love my family more than anything in this world but at the same time every once in a while a man will reach his breaking point . Tonight was one of those occasions for me so after dinner I went for a ride to try and cool down and get my head right. Anyhow you guys don’t need to worry about me . I am not going insane I just miss being in nature and I am not a fan of the modern world. Haven’t reached 50 yet but already feel very disconnected with pop culture and the way things are these days . I guess what makes me the most content is my family (not counting tonight) and being in the outdoors. Everything else is sort of a part of life that is unavoidable and has to be endured regardless if I am willing to deal with it or not .
Anyhow do you guys ever have the same sort of thoughts ? Getting to spend a lot of time in nature and then not coping well with modern society when you’re thrust back into it ? Especially you guys who get a chance to get off the grid for a week or two . Does it take time for you to adapt ? I am sure after awhile everything will fall back into place for me but currently I have a low tolerance for people and the rest of the every day experiences that comes with modern living.
Any thoughts would be appreciated.
Thanks
 

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I have been around for a long time but the last few years have been the most bizarre I have experienced. We live in trying times but don't let them get between you and your family. Talk and resolve any issues ASAP.
 

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Boy I miss those days...mine are in their mid and late 20s....I started young.
REAL Discipline has been lacking since the 90s ...Nothing wrong with discipline and reminding kids whos the boss---kids AREN"T the boss.....I always found that chaotic moments(misbehaving kids)..... were resolved by removing them individually from the scene...sitting them down..setting the story straight..then having them apologize to their mom..grandparents or whomever for acting like that .......after dinner they would help clean up....then would take them spotting or something outside....I did as much as I could to get them outside and away from "modern tech"
I know you have your hands full with the Steelhead Bunch..but always keep it family...family #1. Ask the wife and or kids to go for a drive or hike with you to clear your minds..away from the modern, every day stuff...
 

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I’m 41 and badly struggle with “modern society” and honestly just large groups of people in general. If I’m not at work I’m outside either alone or with my family. When it’s not archery season I embrace:
1. Kayak fishing with my kids
2. Trail running/mountain biking
3. Camping and hiking with the wife and kids.

I hike a lot. Alone. Even all through winter. And yeah, occasionally I have to lose it on my kids at the dinner table. 😂 But overall I’m lucky. My wife and kids are great. But if you dropped all five of us in the middle of nowhere to live in a cabin on 500 acres and I barely ever had interactions with other people I would care less. I would love it.
 

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Kids can be a handful at times and I hate to say it, but even when they're adults and out of the house they will still test your patience. Just last year my 30 year old daughter stopped over for a visit and we never talk politics because it usually gets ugly. For some reason she just kept smart mouthing me and I warned her calmly from my recliner several times to watch her mouth and it wasn't until I tackled her onto the kitchen floor that she realized she went too far. It definitely scared her and she made me a pinky promise never to talk like that to me again and she hasn't. She's a nurse on the eastern side of the state and despite her liberal beliefs we have a great relationship and just met her for dinner Sunday. You definitely want to stay close to your daughters because most likely they will be the one who will be wiping your butt someday.
 

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Being we are close in age, I understand what you are saying. I am fortunate that I do get to take a lot of time to hunt each year. My wife and I are empty nesters, which is actually very nice! Like bone said though older children are just as bad. Our kids are heavy into the modern era and we don't necessarily agree with their views. My wife has to give me the speech before visits happen! Don't lose your cool and be open minded! I really struggle with that to say the least.
In the end, we both pray to have patience and love for our family. My wife and I do a lot together. I do a lot myself. Bowhunting and fishing are top on my list. Sitting back and trying to not let my mind stress myself for no reason is a big part of that. One other thing we did is drop cable TV. No more getting caught up by news feeds. I check local stations (27 news) from time to time.
Hope the best to you and your family. Believe me, you are not alone!
 

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Someone asked me a few weeks ago "How can you always be so happy during THESE times? How do you do it?"
I just shook my head in disbelief and thought for a minute.
"Have your kids hunt something down, kill it, and drag it back to the cave. That's my secret to happiness."

At the breakfast table this morning I had my 7 year old write "I will not call my Dad an idiot" 10 times. You're not alone in this
 

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I'm 54 and have 3 grown kids of my own. 3 beautiful grandkids, twin boys 2 years old and 5 year old granddaughter. For the most part my kids, 2 girls and a boy, were very easy to raise up. I aint sayin we didn't have our issues because we did but they all turned out great I think. My wife and I became foster parents bout 3 years ago. We have just adopted a 3 year old little girl who we had since she was 6 months old. We love her like one of my own and my whole family has adopted her as well. We also are in the process of adopting a 14 month old boy who we have had since he was 3 weeks old. All my family and relatives have all really adopted them as well. At first I thought man what the heck is going on with my life, why am I starting over at 54. We signed our little girl up for tots soccer. I would take her to practice on Sundays and I was the oldest parent there. Most of the dads and moms there I coached some time or another with my kids. I am struggling with not getting out hunting and fishing like I used to. This past year was the least I've been out for either. I guess I just have to try to balance work, family and the outdoors together.
 

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Hang in there Steele. Like you, I had kids late (42 with a 2 year old). Obviously a completely different scenario with only having one kid. I know what you mean about having to go back to work, and try and adapt back in with people that have no sense or appreciation for the world you just left. I deal with it best by talking with coworkers that hunt, texting friends that are still hunting, and just reliving the memories until the next time I can go out again. Luckily for me my season is stretched out nicely between 2 states with multiple buck tags.

I think what really helps us with all the modern day nonsense if where we live. We’re 3 miles back a dirt road along the Blueridge mountains, in a log home, 30 minutes from the closest grocery store. We live the outdoors every day including my wife and little girl. All my hunting is out the backdoor. I don’t have to drive anywhere to experience what I love the most.

Now obviously our choice of where we live will bring its challenges as my little girl grows. But we will take that in stride.

Just do your best to instill the values you know and hold dear into your children the best you can. Make sure hunting and the outdoors are not just a second though and something to so every once in awhile, but a regular part of every day life. And know that there’s always another hunting season, outdoor hike, etc, right around the corner.
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
I am not a very materialistic person . The only things I really spend money on for myself is hunting gear . Could really care less how the rest of society views me in regards to monetary status and importance. In all honesty I could probably be quite content digging ditches with a shovel and living in a tiny shack if it meant I could hunt all the time . With that being said as a father and husband it’s my duty to provide the best financial stability possible for my family. About to walk away from a job of 17 years of for more money and a much closer commute. As a result my hunting time will be cut in half, possibly more than half , so I will have to adapt . My experimental hunting style will no longer be very practical with a limited amount of time . Every hunt will have a greater importance in regards to being successful. The days of just trying something new because I can a hunt a more productive spot later on will not be as common. I will also have to bite the bullet and start finding places closer to home so I can go after work . Never been a fan of knocking on doors to try and get permission. Anyhow I have been around long enough to know things have a way of working out and nothing is ever as daunting as what it appears to be. Just going to have to get outside of my comfort zone . Guess I am just feeling a little overwhelmed right now .
 

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Sounds like you subconsciously realized that you're more of an old dude than a young dude.

Especially once the pop culture starts to annoy you! The music, the fashion, the fads.

For those with kids, my advice is to prioritize doing things in their lives which will cut back on the time you have to hunt, golf, cut wood, or whatever voodoo you do.

Oh, the Saturdays in early November when I spent most of the day inside a hot, humid natatorium for youth swim meets. Or the whole weekends in the summer spent in some bland roadside hotel near where the travel softball tournament was. My lawn was almost hay at times.

But, I also got involved. I ran the timing system at swim meets, all the way thru high school. I kept the scorebook in softball so I got to be in the dugout. Those times are far more precious than any big buck or hole in one.

To me, having a family means putting yourself down on the priority list. Not to give up on yourself completely, but pick your spots. Less becomes more.

Then there comes a time when they are all grown, do their thing, and you find that you again have more time. But you'll miss those days that took all your time away.

In your 40s you might feel like you're getting old. You're not there yet. Its when things start to hurt for no reason, your discussions with doctors take on more serious topics, and those grey hairs migrate from your temple to other places do you start to think, dang, I might be past that halfway point.

All things require balance, if you can't figure out how to get there, it figures it out for itself.

And in the end, you only truly become "old' if you let yourself. I ain't old. I am just "more experienced".
 

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I’ve known for a long, long time that I don’t like modern society. Heck I don’t even have a cell phone. Let alone actually relate to some things of today.

but I have never had to get in the car to take a ride and calm down from dealing with my family, let alone my son. I can’t ever see that happening. regardless of my feelings about the outdoors, my number one priority in life is being the best dad that I can be for my son. Period.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 · (Edited)
I’ve known for a long, long time that I don’t like modern society. Heck I don’t even have a cell phone. Let alone actually relate to some things of today.

but I have never had to get in the car to take a ride and calm down from dealing with my family, let alone my son. I can’t ever see that happening. regardless of my feelings about the outdoors, my number one priority in life is being the best dad that I can be for my son. Period.
I understand it looks bad on my part but at the same time having 4 children……9, 7 ,5 and 4 brings on different challenges. Especially when you’re alone with them all day . They’re all good kids for the most part but there are moments where my house is absolute chaos and they get so wound up it pushes to the brink of insanity.
Last night was the first time I ever did anything like that and I think it was good for everyone. For myself to put things back into perspective and for the older boys to have some time to think about their actions and talk with mom one on one.
 

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I understand it looks bad on my part but at the same time having 4 children……9, 7 ,5 and 4 brings on different challenges. Especially when you’re alone with them all day . They’re all good kids for the most part but there are moments where my house is absolute chaos and they get so wound up it pushes to the brink of insanity.
Last night was the first time I ever did anything like that and I think it was good for everyone. For myself to put things back into perspective and for the older boys to have some time to think about their actions and talk with mom one on one.
looks like you had a rough night. kids will be kids.
I don't have kids, but i am thinking back when i was a kid, My dad was not an easy man and he took it out on all of us physically (understatement). But i still remember the good times.
What i am trying to say is, looks like you are a good father, they wont remember any of this when they grow up, if they need a lesson once in a while, when growing up, its no big deal.
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
I understand that the kids were part of my post but that really wasn’t the major issue . Last evening is also probably being interpreted a lot worse than it really was . I did yell but I wasn’t throwing stuff around the house and slamming doors. I basically just said my peace and told the wife I am going out to get some fresh air.
Anyhow the focal point of the post was to demonstrate the challenges of leaving the peace and serenity of the outdoors and integrating back into the real world.
 

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What would you rather hear ? The sound of traffic or a mountain stream running just after it rained ? Blue jays carrying on in the distance or someone complaining about their job ? Squirrels and chipmunks rustling in the leaves or the evening news ? Standing in the checkout line at the grocery store or watching a coyote sneak through the woods by your tree ? Observing a doe with her fawns or listening about politics on the local radio channel ?
Had a bad night tonight . The kids have been misbehaving a little more than normal and I kind of lost it at the dinner table . Having a lot of regret for losing my cool but the wife was understanding and was pretty much on my side . ( She would of made it clear if I was being irrational) With that being said I love my family more than anything in this world but at the same time every once in a while a man will reach his breaking point . Tonight was one of those occasions for me so after dinner I went for a ride to try and cool down and get my head right. Anyhow you guys don’t need to worry about me . I am not going insane I just miss being in nature and I am not a fan of the modern world. Haven’t reached 50 yet but already feel very disconnected with pop culture and the way things are these days . I guess what makes me the most content is my family (not counting tonight) and being in the outdoors. Everything else is sort of a part of life that is unavoidable and has to be endured regardless if I am willing to deal with it or not .
Anyhow do you guys ever have the same sort of thoughts ? Getting to spend a lot of time in nature and then not coping well with modern society when you’re thrust back into it ? Especially you guys who get a chance to get off the grid for a week or two . Does it take time for you to adapt ? I am sure after awhile everything will fall back into place for me but currently I have a low tolerance for people and the rest of the every day experiences that comes with modern living.
Any thoughts would be appreciated.
Thanks
As I was reading this, I had to chuckle a little. This was my night last night and most nights recently. My 6 year old is being a terror at the dinner table. My wife and I cook every night and we sit as a family and have a meal together. I will not deviate from that no matter how bad he behaves. My 19 year old college age son and my 6 year old sometimes drive us insane but in just a few short years we will miss all this. I too feel out of touch with our society, I try to balance not listening to the news and staying informed. The news just makes me angry most days. Getting outside and turning off the cellphone and all outside interruptions seems the only thing that keeps me centered. Stay true to who you are, thank your creator and treat everyone with kindness and respect. (Even if they sometimes don't deserve it) Things will work out the way god planned, we just have to trust the plan.
 

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Best thing for mental health these days? Turn off the news, be it TV, radio or social media. Listen to music, read hunting books or magazines. Do something physical. I cut and split wood, hunt, mow grass, do yard work, gardening, rake leaves, just about anything to be outside, even when it's cold. The main thing is to disassociate oneself from the constant barrage of news. Last but not least be thankful for being born in this country. The poorest in this country have it a hundred times better than the poor in other countries.
 
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