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NEW YORK—In a controversial decision to crack down on gaudy displays of jubilation, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell announced plans Wednesday to fine fans thousands of dollars for celebrating excessively in the stands. “Offending individuals engaged in elaborate rituals that involve props, choreographed dances, or leaving their feet will face stiff monetary penalties,” said Goodell, adding that every taunt, chant, cardboard sign, and chest bump will be reviewed by the league. “The NFL simply will not tolerate poor sportsmanship, and any spectator committing extreme celebrations, such as collaborating with others to display a cardboard capital “D” and a picket fence, or removing articles of clothing after a touchdown, will receive a $30,000 fine and be ejected from the game.” Goodell also told reporters teams would receive a 15-yard penalty anytime a fan gets out of line by clapping too loudly or shouting complaints about a referee’s call.






Just kidding--found this on The Onion. But the scary part is that it is believable.
 

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Wow, I'll admit, you had me. Anything that comes from that clown is believable.
 
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