anger & frustration................LOL - The HuntingPA.com Outdoor Community
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post #1 of 10 (permalink) Old 11-29-2017, 02:30 AM Thread Starter
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anger & frustration................LOL

A small balding man storms into a local bar and demands, "Gimme a double of the strongest whiskey you got. I'm so mad, I can't even see straight."

The bartender, noticing that the little man is a bit the worse for wear, pours him a double of Southern Comfort. The man swills down the drink and says,
"Gimme another one."

The bartender pours the drink, but says, "Now, before I give you this, why don't you let off a little steam and tell me why you're so upset?"

So, the man begins his tale. "Well, I was sitting in the bar next door, when this gorgeous blonde slinks in and actually sits beside me at the bar. I thought,
"Wow, this has never happened before." You know, it was kind of a fantasy come true. Well, a couple of minutes later, the blonde leans over and
asks if I'd like to come back to her hotel to have dinner and talk for a while. I couldn't believe this was happening, and I hadn't had a good meal in quite a while.

I managed to nod my head yes, so she grabs my hand and starts walking out of the bar. This seemed just too good to be true."
He continued, "She took me down the street here to a nice hotel and up to her room. She said to relax, watch some TV,
and that she would be ready to go down to the restaurant in a few minutes. But, as soon as I put my feet up and reclined my chair,
I heard some keys jingling and someone starts fumbling with the door."

"The blonde says, 'Oh my god, it's my boyfriend. He must have lost his wrestling match tonight, he's gonna be real mad. Quick, hide!'"

"So, I opened the closet, but I figured that was probably the first place he would look, so I didn't hide there. Then I looked under the bed, but no,
I figured he's bound to look there, too. By now, I could hear the key in the lock. I noticed the window was open, so I climbed out and was hanging there by my fingers, praying that the guy wouldn't see me."

The bartender says "Well I can see how you might be a bit frustrated at this point."

"Well, yeah, but I hear the guy finally get the door open and he yells out, 'Who you been with now, you witch?' The girl says, 'Nobody, honey, now calm down.'"

Well, the guy starts tearing up the room. I hear him tear the door off the closet and throw it across the room. I'm thinking, 'Boy, I'm glad I didn't hide in there.'
Then I hear him lift up the bed and throw it across the room. Good thing I didn't hide under there either. Then I heard him say, 'What's that over there by the window?'
I think, 'Oh God, I'm dead meat now.'

But, the blonde by now is trying real hard to distract him and convince him to stop looking. Well, I hear the guy go into the bathroom and I hear water running for a long time;
I figure maybe he's gonna take a bath or something, when all of a sudden, the jerk pours a pitcher of scalding hot water out of the window right on top of my head.
I mean, look at this, I got second degree burns all over my scalp and shoulders!"

The bartender says, "Oh man, that would have gotten me mad for sure."

"No, that didn't really bother me. Next, the guy starts slamming the window shut over and over on my hands.
I mean, look at my fingers. They're a bloody mess. I can hardly hold onto this glass."

The bartender looks at the guy's hands and says, "Yeah, buddy, I can understand why you are so upset."

"No, that wasn't what really got me so angry though."

The bartender then asks in exasperation, "Well, then, what did finally make you anger?"

"Well, I was hanging on the window, and I turned around and looked down--I was only about six inches off the ground."

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post #2 of 10 (permalink) Old 11-29-2017, 03:56 AM
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dc21 leave you his joke book?
jimsdad and bad primer like this.

Shoot straight

People are sick of politicians, and me, I hate cats in the house.
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post #3 of 10 (permalink) Old 11-29-2017, 06:07 AM Thread Starter
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dc21 leave you his joke book?
ahh, no. if he had you would have been reading humorless stories EVERY day.............
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post #4 of 10 (permalink) Old 11-29-2017, 08:37 AM
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It was kind of corny
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post #5 of 10 (permalink) Old 11-29-2017, 08:59 AM
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I'm going to start reading the endings first.
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post #6 of 10 (permalink) Old 11-30-2017, 06:43 AM
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All I can say is, that's about as bad as it gets.

Itís funny until somebody gets hurt, then itís hilarious
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post #7 of 10 (permalink) Old 11-30-2017, 08:26 AM
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All I can say is, that's about as bad as it gets.
What's "as bad as it gets"? That part about only being a short distance form the ground or the joke itself?


Good night Chesty, wherever you are......
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post #8 of 10 (permalink) Old 11-30-2017, 08:36 AM
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What's "as bad as it gets"? That part about only being a short distance form the ground or the joke itself?


Both. If badprimer ever gives me a bad review again......."May the fleas of a thousand camels infest his armpits."
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Itís funny until somebody gets hurt, then itís hilarious

Last edited by dc 21; 11-30-2017 at 08:40 AM.
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post #9 of 10 (permalink) Old 11-30-2017, 02:02 PM
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Both. If badprimer ever gives me a bad review again......."May the fleas of a thousand camels infest his armpits."
I guess from now on we call you Klinger?

Shoot straight

People are sick of politicians, and me, I hate cats in the house.
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post #10 of 10 (permalink) Old 11-30-2017, 02:21 PM Thread Starter
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Both. If badprimer ever gives me a bad review again......."May the fleas of a thousand camels infest his armpits."

what type of cheese do you prefer with your WHINE ?......................

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